Pritha RaySircar+Next Step

Closing the Last Chapter

Accomplishments... "I'd like to acknowledge myself for..."

changing my language .... like from survivor to thriver
power -- and not being afraid of my power -- and the space that is making for me
waiting to see what that new space can hold
coming into a sense of nationalism, where my country is my body, and the beginnings of an allegiance to myself
my wicked skills in the kitchen
for all the degrees I have (4 Undergraduate degrees & 3 Masters)
for coming to peace for having lived my life not for myself
owning up to the resentments I've carried because of that
for being an iconoclast
for asking difficult questions and sticking around to help build answers
for my loyalty
my sense of duty
for the knowledge that I can re-tune my senses of loyalty and duty
for sensing my higher purpose
for having this be the Year of Being Uncomfortable
for sticking to it and finding the lessons there
for my ability to love
for the care I feel for the well-being of others ... sincere interest in whether others are eating enough, sleeping well, being happy...
for never being bored
for being a hard-tryer
for leaving college at 20 to become a journalist, then moved to Hong Kong to start MTV Asia, then to Susan, to City of Cambridge, then a public policy degree. For making value from my circumstances
for not knowing why coming here would matter and coming anyway
for having the intuition that this was an important destination
for staying, and committing, even when I wanted to leave
for working hard -- playing with the knobs and dials of my identity and openness to feedback
for shifting from thinking I'm a humble person to seeing I could flex my humilty muscle more
for showing up... and for practicing not showing up
for saying "no" -- sometimes with my body and other times with my mouth
for not needing approval
for feeling uncomfortable acknowledging myself
for understanding the practice of acknowledgement would lead to a healthier me
for having the idea of the TheMAKE
for failing to make TheMAKE happen and then continuing on until I translated it to a built edible garden
for weathering all the meetings, town halls, PTAs, Rotary Clubs... to reach community partners
for the successes and failures of the pilot
for finding a way to be happy and grateful for the pilot
for feeling like a child again (in parent's front yard) and being able to say "Look Mom & Dad, I made this!"
for being open to things... like shiny flecks, smells, stories,
continuously working on dismantling my significant armor
learning I needed to come into my own womanhood rather than thinking I needed more women
for learning not to just make myself someone else's problem.. exploring it and taking steps within it
being thorough, prepared, erudite and articulate
and the ability to be playful
captivating person to interact with... surprised to see what shows up next
for the courage to connect the parts of yourself to a path and purpose
how quickly you are able to connect and speak with people and all the relationships you formed in my community (& Sharon & CoCyclers)
for the part of you reaching out into the world to create an impact, and the impact you're making in more lives than you can know
wanting to belong to something (and staying with it so that I was one)
being an impactful teacher - what you teach from your experience, language, insight & clarity / what you teach from your being the beautiful loving moments and challenging difficult ones
sense of deep, profound love and caring within you
your path of practice and devotion in the world
calling people to a deeper level of truth, integrity and purpose with your own intensity of truth
for taking chances... expensive ones.... face palming, yet getting up to go on
for shifting the mission of the make to "neighbors building neighborhoods by any means necessary"
being provocative as a younger person, but then plumbing the depths of the provocation to find the truth in the ugliness in love
transformation within you... that enabled you to learn to be here... to stay in new and uncomfortable ways
not knowing what the hell I'm doing. Really.
not worrying about how to replicate these results / this transformation again
Ruben: many of the greatest lessons I'm bringing home began and emerged from interactions with you
allowing my stories to come undone
allowing my characters/selves to be unhoused
for being awesome
for being easily impressed ... and difficult to impress... and for releasing myself in the mirror so I can see something that's not monstrous
for new eyes ... which are small
for discovering your power could be expressed in ways that nourish (that you call "soft"), not just ways that slice (that you call "hard")
for hanging with my coach (who showed up like a polka dot bow, but lives like a ninja) and has become an important part of my new imaginal cells
for being the "only vagina" but bringing the power of 3 or 4 women - "poly-vaginal"
for finding a place within the group where women appear to me - being open to the idea that gender isn't so fixed - opening to the feminine and letting go of prejudices - it's not as important that your a "man" or a "woman" but experiencing a new appearance of masculine/feminine/feminism
having MoJo
for leaving behind my trauma lens. I will no longer look at my present and future through my past troubles.

Completions

I failed to quit smoking
I'm done thinking I'm a failure. Releasing that picture. Over it. And everything that goes with that.
I'm over envy, self-pity and hopelessness
I don't have to suffer. I can be deeply involved with painful and challenging things and still feel good
I don't have to be a nuclear physicist, OBGYN, or all those other things.... I need no more accreditation
I release myself from the stories I tell about people - more listening... less telling/writing
I entirely love my father - snout to hoof. I have released the stories and pain... forgiveness.
I don't have to carry with me the story anymore that I don't love my father... I've waited my whole life to to be able to do this.
let go of the expectation of having expectations / practice existing without having so many expectations. Weight. Baggage.
release the goal of being a jillionnaire (to be loved by my father and mother)
let go of all goals I can't meet, because their not real
of being on the cover of Fast Company
loosen my relationship with vanity ... a teabag that's steeping too long in myself
release from my expectation of having children or getting married
the contradiction of needing to unique and yet present like everyone else
no more dating abusive men
I release myself from my mother's death

Opening the Next Chapter

Where magic and inspiration are leading me

intrapreneural or innovation position in a place like The Container Store because I see organization is a deeply empowering act
share the gift of self-love -- a hallmark card to yourself
self-care innovator
maybe how TheMAKE could be intrapreneurial
more involved in Futurism... and what could be
meet some of my heros and heroines in London
figuring out the mojo that frees people from their adherances
exploring how to create the magical moments that can release deep issues and create transformation
how to make TheMAKE transformational... intentionally providing THOSE experiences
experiences which can fulfill all good intentions of participants
stealth transformation
I'd like to get married... There's too much of me to carry it all alone.

Infinity Principle - Ratio: Happiness: Appreciation/Expectation